Thursday, August 31
I have a colleague who loves to apologize for his misogynistic comments. To begin, he'll say something completely moronic, or something completely understandable--doesn't matter. What matters is that his incredibly astute and sophisticated understanding of feminist linguistic politics sends up a flag for him (go ahead and read something into that, if you can manage not to lose your lunch over the idea). The opportunity to bask in the glory of his brilliant realization overcomes him and he stops, always mid-sentence. "I'm sorry. That was sooo mis-aaaah-gynistic." The ensuing conversation always involves at least three more opportunities for him to say misogynistic and at least one, but probably two opportunities to say some form of the word patriarchy. For a kicker, he always concludes that his original stupid-ass point must stand and that he has a bona fide need for the allegedly misogynistic term or concept. (This is just what the world needs, linguistic BFQs.) Listening to his self-congratulatory musings on the oppression of women is one of my favorite ways to spend an afternoon. (Can you see me batting my long luxurious Sienna eyelashes?)

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I've been lurking around here for a long time but haven't managed to put up a real entry yet. Does this make me a slacker? That would be interesting since just being here seems to make everyone else a slacker. Nevertheless, I feel like a slacker for failing to post. So I thought I'd debut with a theme that might provide me with more ideas for secrets to reveal later. If you're brave enough to join me in this game, just jump right in with "behind door #whatever.comes.next". My plan to help muddy the identity waters is to draw from lots of places and previous experiences, with just a dash of a pure fiction. That way the personalities won't add up to anything identifiable, or if they do add up to something-- You know the standard disclaimer.

6 comments:

Clear said...

Speaking of slackers, I need to send out the next round of a.secret invites. The start of the semester has been hectic for this site's see-through houseboy. I think I'm not sure how the "Behind Door #" idea works, although I like anything that's a Let's Make A Deal reference.

Sulphur Siren said...

I'm in your corner Sienna! Although I would be more harsh and call them 'Conscious Assholes'. People who make a comment they know is ridiculous then talk about how ridiculous it is but then try to justify how they should be allowed to make them...or some equally inane sort of indescribably faulty logic. My secret desire is to come up with a razor sharp witty comeback that will make them stop doing that crap...evermore!

kodachrome said...

Er. I'm sorry? ;-)

Glad to see you on the front page, Sienna.

Sulpher, conscious asshole has a better ring, but the literal translation is decidedly more disturbing.

Turquoise Stuff said...

This would be frustrating, indeed. I don't think I have such a person in my immediate environment these days. That's nice to know. Sometimes it's helpful to hear about other people's complaints to realize how good you have it in some realms.:-)

Welcome, Sienna, good start.

Like Clear, however, I'm also not 100% clear on hte Behind Door # theme, but that hasn't stopped me before.:-)

thistle said...

Oh, how I hate the Conscious Misogynists, who think prefacing their offensive remarks with a half-apology for their sexism makes it any better.
One of my professors used to say:
"I know you feminists might find this offensive [wink, smirk] but ..."

In other words, I'm right there with you Sienna.

Sienna said...

I guess Sienna is about as "clear" as mud, but Thistle and Scarlet seem to have figured it out—to my rolling on the floor delight, I might add! The door numbers would be a series of entertaining caricatures.

I guess I should admit that I’m not really the type to “take” Conscious Pig behavior. So I did manage to make it stop, though I wasn’t especially witty about it. Now, though, I’m wishing I had addressed the underlying Conscious Pig thing, rather than merely training him not to pull that cr*p on me. Hmm. witty. He doesn’t seem deserving.

Thistle, I don’t let people get away with telling me that feminists are sensitive, either. I’m not offended; I’m pissed.

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