Academic Secret

While talking with a friend yesterday, I mentioned some insanity in my department, and he decided to remind me to keep my head down.

Now don't get excited, thinking you know who I am because you just reminded X friend to keep his head down. I'm pretty sure that the "head down" advice is the most common suggestion given to assistant professors.

The other common exchange is the "checking in" parody. This is especially obnoxious when it comes from the senior colleagues to whom you're trying to defer (while being completely buried in the service work they don't want to do). They've noticed that you don't answer your email or come to the office anymore, that you don't smile much, and you don't talk at faculty meetings. They've noticed that you've changed. You used to slam your fist on the table to demand things, and then laugh about it, but now you seem down-in-the-mouth (or, rather, the chin). And so... They'd like you to be happier.

When my friend reminded me to keep my head down, I laughed. I don't get involved with those people anymore. They're crazy. All I do is try to keep my head above water, while also keeping my head down, and my chin up. Head down, chin up, head down, chin up. There should be music.